It’s a bitter pill to swallow when you realise that some people do not like you and will never like you. Not because you have done anything at all to them. No. You may never have stepped out of line with them…. Not in the slightest…. They just don’t like you and will never like you just for the sake of it… For no justifiable reason at all.
It can be particularly painful when it’s coming from a person you actually like and hold in high esteem. And you may have even shown them the likeness you feel for them in many ways. But they simply don’t like you, inspite of the fact that you have demonstrated that you like them.
They don’t like you! They are entitled NOT to like you. They are NOT obliged to like you. So what are you going to do about it?
That is where maturity and wisdom come in. To ACCEPT that it is their right not to like you. To RESPECT their choice not to like you. To make no further DEMANDS on them to like you. To NOT feel entitled to your expectation of them to give you a reason for their dislike for you. To QUIT seeking their “likeness” and simply be content with their choice of not liking you. To NOT hold it against them for not liking you. And to avoid seeking ways to make them pay or regret not liking you.
You simply put it down to the fact that You win some, you lose some. That’s life for you. It is most unrealistic of you to expect everyone who has heard about you or who has interacted with you to like you.
Even some family members to whom you have done no harm will dislike you for no reason. If people who are related to you by blood can dislike you for no apparent reason other than just because they are capable of disliking you, then you should even expect worse from people who are unrelated to you by blood. Many people don’t like their spouses, some mothers don’t like their children. Yep, I have seen this LIVE. These mothers only tolerate their children. Some fathers loath their children and work against their progress.
I personally know a sister who hates her brother with a passion. She simply can’t stand his guts and does everything she can to undermine him and bring him down a peg or two. I know kids who dislike their parents and merely endure their parents’ company and presence. Not to talk of cousins hating each other for no reasons. All these abound.
So you see friends and other strangers not liking you na moin-moin. Get over yourself and accept that they are fully entitled to dislike you, just as you are fully entitled to either like them or not like them. Nothing stops you from liking a person who dislikes you. Just be yourself and be comfortable in your own decision either to like or to dislike anyone or anything without having to explain yourself or give reasons for your disposition towards people.
This is my own way of dealing with people who don’t like me for no reason at all… I was surprised to realise that a significant number of people do not like me for no reason. I have never done them any harm, they simply don’t like me and inspite of how shocking it is for me to realise this, I have decided to respect their choice and accept it without any bitterness or anger towards them. So help me God, Amen.
Written by Ada Ujaligwa, a Medical Doctor based in Ireland.
PS: I loved this wonderful piece, well articulated by Ada. She described it all in this post and it’s so true that sometimes, you realise that certain people don’t like you for no reasons at all. And you wonder why this happens. And I believe there are some people we also don’t seem to like no matter how they try to impress us. This happens everywhere, in workplaces, communities, organisations, churches, schools, and even here in the blogging world. I think so.
Does the post resonate with you? Is it relatable? Do you have any experience to share with us about this?
Life is full of wonders and surprises… The lessons we learn in life are many and complex.
Peace and Love!
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